IN THE BEGINNING the world existed without sports... and then unto the world came Cain and his brother Abel. These two brothers would go hunting each day to bring food with their spears. The typical early meal consisted of speared fish, speared asparagus, speared rabbit, speared... well you get the idea. One evening Cain had a great idea.... "Abel we need to keep our bodies in fit shape. Let's play a game which will be physically demanding and thereby give us pleasure whilst we improve our health." Abel replied, " An excellent idea! in fact we can use this game to improve our hunting skills!" "Of course," replied Cain, " We'll each toss our spears with our greatest force and the other will go fetch it!" Alas, in his excitement Abel thought Cain said "catch it" and the formation of sports suffered an early set back. Never-the-less the idea of recreation soon caught on... leading up to such great rivalries as the Egyptians verus the Romans, the Greeks versus the Trojans, and the Christians verus the lions. This final rivalry led to the longest winning streak in history ... Lions 1147 - Christians 1.. and the first sports arena. The fervor led to a great acceptance of sports by the people, and as a result they lost interest in wars, thievery, and politics and a general time of peace fell over the land. Naturally, this didn't go over too well with the rulers of the day who had been elected to conduct wars, steal, and lie. So they banned any kind of sports activity. But so great was the demand for sports that the people revolted, causing the fall of the Roman Empire, and sports became a permanent part of history. In modern times we still honor the great sports leader of ancient days, Kareen magic Babe Boomer Ty Pastoricus, who led his people in revolt, by reciting his rallying cry.. "SPORTS OR CONSEQUENCES"